Dateline: March, 2017; South Beach, Miami
Sitting on one of the world’s best beaches, witnessing a #zip was the last thing on my mind. Witnessing amazing views – both on the water and out – was the expectation. Who would have thought that such views AND a #zip would be possible???
Miami’s ‘tops-optional’ beaches are a national treasure. Those who bare all are largely prima-caliber. True to form, the lass below started out SO promising. But she couldn’t stick to just looking hot … she had to tempt fate by acting a fool. (Not to be confused with the popular TNT hoops segment, “Shaqtin’ a Fool”; can’t resist linking to the amazing run of Javale McGee ribs here. Just be sure to come back to primatomma when done.)
It started out as an innocent photo shoot. You know, the kind where the boyfriend is acting the photographer and his girl strikes various poses, playing along with the skit. Most times it’s an innocent 30 seconds of glamming for the lens. But not with our aspiring super model below. This vixen proceeds to twist and turn for 25 minutes in front of a beach of ogling spectators. Now I know what you’re thinking; “prima, isn’t that the sort of thing that enhances an otherwise sedentary day looking out at nothingness?”
When a smoke-show spends 25 minutes in seductive poses practically naked on the beach, that’s a good thing. When she then spends the next 45 minutes buried under a towel to review the 200 pictures she took, certainly editing along the way, she’s a Zero in Public. This exhibit of self aggrandizement and narcissism was beyond comical. Her poor Euro-boyfriend … he of the banana hammock swimsuit and dental floss arms.
Sorry hotness, but welcome to #zipville.