Revved up for RPM – DC


The primatomma staff took to the streets of DC last night – Mt. Vernon neighborhood – to review a modern take on classic Italian dishes, RPM Italian.  The off-shoot of Chicago’s versions by the same name (both “Steak” and “Italian” options there), we aimed to see if celebrity couple Bill & Giuliana Rancic and partners could replicate their successful Chicago concepts with the finicky DC crowd.

Located at 601 Massachusetts Ave, NW, near the Marriott Marquis and Convention Center, we knew parking would be an issue.  No problem, valet parking available!  Problem, $12 per car!!!  Not off to the best start.  You want me to pay for a top dollar dining experience AND milk me for parking?  Non buono, RPM!  I’d rather tip the valet workers that amount – they need it a hell of a lot more considering your charge of $25 per pour of Red Breast that sells for $65/bottle at the ABC Store.

Once inside, the beautiful people were only surpassed by the beautiful decor.  (Disclaimer:  It’s DC folks, so keep the “beautiful people” in perspective.  “Beautiful for DC” is more apropos.)  A packed bar with full tables made cocktails a bit of a challenge.  The bar staff seemed less experienced than you would expect at such a hot spot.  But primatomma always finds a way:  Skip the 3 people deep front bar and make your way to the secluded bar toward the back of the restaurant.  There you will find 6 empty seats with bartender Jessica who is equally adept at her craft as she is conversation.  All while handling a dizzying array of drink orders from diners.  Ahhh… to be 22 again.  We look forward to seeing you again, Jessica!

Dinner seating was 30 minutes late but time passed quickly thanks to good company and a complimentary round of drinks (Bravo, RPM!).  We sat in the VIP area (did someone tip off our identities???!!) which was perfect as we were ready to party.  We sampled across the salad and apps options … the meatballs were unanimously voted the “must have” pre-entree selection.

Entrees were chosen from simple, traditional Italian to more daring dishes and all passed with flying colors.  The presentation was spot-on and the portions ample but not obnoxious.  Waitress Sue made sure we were well tended to and that our ample thirst was quenched.

The highlight oRPMf the night was dessert:  Torta Meringata, a flaming masterpiece pictured to the left.  Major shout out to Manager Josh Moore who demanded we experience this fine ass delicacy – a MUST HAVE when you visit RPM.  And Josh is a must-meet as well.  He goes very well with the third bottle of wine.

Overall, a rough start to our evening that was salvaged by a fun staff, good food, excellent drinks, and an outstanding dessert.  But expect some of the growing pains that we experienced.

RPM Italian, primatomma awards you a coveted p rating.  But we hold high expectations that within 6 months, a second p will be added.  Getting rid of that valet parking fee and adding more experienced bartenders to the front bar should get you there!



Enough is Enough

Occasionally primatomma shares contributions from our loyal readers. Such opinions are those of the reader and not necessarily shared by the staff of primatomma.

The following reflects upon recent events of violence in Dallas, Baton Rouge, and elsewhere from primaJP, a Veteran who simply “gets it” and has had enough:



Dear Ignorant Civilians,

I will not be a part of your race war. You can take it and shove it up your ungrateful asses. I will not fall victim to ruthless, crooked politicians who employ race baiting slum lords to carry out their dirty work in a effort to divide the red, white and blue nation we built in unison. I know a different place where men/women see no color – I’ve seen it, I’ve felt it, I’ve sweat for it and I’ve cried for it. You’ll never break our spirit.

I do not support/will not tolerate the killing of Police Officers, Military Veterans, innocent civilians or targeting people for their sexual orientation, religion or skin color.

If you’re committing a crime, violently resisting arrest or make a sudden, questionable move at gun point from an LEO, you should anticipate great bodily harm or even death. If an LEO has a gun to your chest, the situation is serious – if you do not follow instructions, there’s a chance you WILL be killed. It’s not racist, it’s not unfair – it’s consequences – even if the LEO is wrong, you will still be dead, your family will be left to grieve.

If you’re going to seek employment in Law Enforcement, please ensure you are up to the challenges, training, physical and mental standards that are required with the job. A lifetime behind bars or exiled as a murderer is not worth decent pay and a pension. Military aside, LEO the forefront of the first responder community. Be educated, be prepared and be ready to own your actions – if you’re faking it for the benefits, you are a liability to yourself, your fellow officers and the citizens you swore to protect.

Social justice warriors – please stop talking about how certain people have privilege or should feel guilty for being American or whatever other nonsense your “Professor” mentioned in your last class. Maybe you feel guilty because you haven’t done anything with your life. Maybe you feel guilty because you’ve never stood up for something larger than yourself. Maybe you’re not pleased with who you are, your lack of spine, awareness, experience, confidence or self worth. Sitting in a college quad, smoking pot with a bunch of upper-middle class kids (who look just like you) from neighborhoods just like yours and talking about equality is not making a difference. Do less whining and more doing – look around you – I see it all the time in NYC, guys walk right by a mother (who happens to be ethnic) struggling to get her heavy stroller up a long flight of stairs with 2 young kids by her side – too busy on their phones to help I guess? That’s okay, I usually step in and pick up your pathetic ignorance and slack – right before you created that neat little meme about “privilege”…..

Internet ISIS Hunters/Cross fit operators – buying tactical clothing, sporting beards, running around with stupid Spartan swag and doing silly WODs/races/challenges doesn’t make you a veteran, “professional soldier” or whatever the fuck else you think you are….I don’t care if you almost joined, I don’t care if the race you did was invented by secret recon delta force astronauts. I don’t care about your “friends” (Facebook pages) who are SEALs. Stop shoving “freedom” in everyone’s faces if you never served a day in uniform. If you’re passionate enough about it, join – make a difference, if not, it’s all good – just go be you.

Last, I’d like to create a motion for us Mediterranean people to exit the Caucasian race. We feel we’d do better on our own since we tend to have olive skin and tan better than the rest of you 🙂 We will now be labeled as tan people in addition to the black, brown and yellow people. #MedExit